One day I woke up in the morning as the sunshine came to life from the blackness of night in Canadian’s biggest city; Toronto. It had shone brightly through my dirty smudge-thick bedroom window bringing colour into the attic. There was no need for an invitation. It was a moment that was exceptionally beautiful, like the girl sleeping naked beside me, peacefully. I had rented a room high up in an old Victorian house on the downtown neighbourhood core; The Annex. It was perfect and I have never been happier living in the heart of a big city. The Annex during the spring time had a delightful sense of bliss. I had no doubt that it wouldn't last.
Spring had finally sprung in Toronto after a long white winter and the city was ready for a new season to be filled with surprises. Twelve hour day of sunlight and twelve hour life of the darkness, an even balance like the compromise of a healthy relationship; if only it was true. As I walked through the park under the cherry blossom tree with my Laurie, who I had only known for less than three months. Her figure is an inverted body shape with her breasts that had a wide space in between them. As far as my tastes were concerned, perfect. She was a trustworthy, flexible and outgoing girl. She claimed to be from mainland of Europe but I don't believe her due to the fact that her English was very well spoken and even better than my own native tongue. She could translate Russian, French and Spanish into perfect English. My friends appreciated her presence and accepted her personality. There was no argument during the time we had spent together but there was a constant battle in my head weather I was in love with her or not.
I was in debate, could she fulfil me? For a man who is passionately in love with a girl who has a low sexual drive and he thinks about her throughout the day or not to be in love with a girl who delivers a regular enjoyable sex life but has no time for his mistakes. It was a tough decision to make and find a practical solution; weighing options to ultimately define his love life.
The Sakura trees near the Hillside Gardens in High park have opened into full bloom. The water at the Lakefront was rested and calm. We took a stroll along the gravel pathway together hand in hand to meet up with Laurie's friends as we had planned a panic all together. Her friends bore the crap out of me and I had no interest to make the time to develop a suitable friendship with them. Her friends had a different taste of interest and too damn well mannered. They were afraid to take risk and try something, perfectly happy to live in their comfort zone; if that is living, but man must compromise to keep the peace.
Maybe it was a test or maybe it was for us to become closer. She liked my friends and there was never a backfire about them. She was a perfect fit for them. However, in her group of friends, there were two guys from her social group who had some emotional feelings towards Laurie and I was warned by some of her friends. It is funny to say that whenever someone really likes someone but that person who he likes or has feeling for, is actually into somebody else. Love is can be a strange confusing game. Jealousy is a waste of time and only brings doubts to oneself. One of those gentlemen had asked her to model for his photography project. You don't mind, do you? She had asked me in front of him and her friends. I am cool with it. You should do what you want, it might be fun. I had responded as it if I had ordered a Big Mac from McDonald's. The young photography had a big wide smile across his face. I felt that he had high hopes of achieving something sexual of it. Yet, I did not feel threatened. Lucky enough, a good friend of mine from Paris had texted me and invited me to meet up with him at the bar on the corner of College and Bathurst Street. It was that time of day when cold ones were calling out my name. I had left Laurie with her group of friends at the park shortly after I received the message. I had made an agreement to meet up with her later on that night and said Adieu to her friends. My buddy had saved my afternoon of boredom.
After a few rounds of fresh Molson Canadian beers with one of my best friends from France, I began to speak honest and openly. I had explained to him how I had felt about Laurie. I had admitted to him that sleeping with her was by far one of the best sexual experiences of my entire life. I had also explained to my Frenchie that I saw no future of us together and refused to marry a girl in order to stay in Canada forever, which was my ultimate dream; A life in the Great White North. I could not marry a girl who I did not love and would only commit if the passion was there. I would have to have some deep feelings for her and undoubtedly like to have spent the time and effort to be with her for eternity. Otherwise, it would turn into a mega nasty problem for our future together if the relationship was meaningless. I would hate myself to ever hurt a good girl like Laurie. You are certainly wasting your time man! Do you really want to play around with someone's heart? He said to me with a very serious hard look in his eyes. He must have been in this situation in the past, but I had never asked him. He had made a clear point and I had to acknowledged this confronting point. I brought the next round of pitchers to show him my respects and took in his appreciation towards his option. It takes an effect to be realistic and that is what mates should do for one another; to have real honesty, loyalty and no back stabbing.
I sat on my front porch waiting for Laurie that night after the bar. The weather was chilly and there was a cool breeze in the air. Laurie had always taken her time to get ready and always arrived late. I played poker with my housemates to kill the time as I waited for her. My head was not in the game and already lost one hundred dollars after an hour of playing. There was no need to stressed about the money. Laurie had been on my mind ever since I came home. I kept asking myself if I wanted to be with her for the right reasons and move our relationship to the next level. There were a few clear conclusions resolved and had to admit that the she was beautiful, great looking girl and the sex was amazingly good. But everything else about her had irritated me; her choice of food, taste of music, her neediness and her friends. There was no doubt that I was still in-love with the girl from South of France who had left me heartbroken after four years we had spent together.
When Laurie finally arrived, she sat beside me in the chair with her legs crossed, wagging the right leg up and down in a steady pace. She kept staring at me as if she was planning our future. It made me uncomfortable and distracted me from the cards. The housemates had even noticed her strange, awkward behaviour. Her eyes laid onto me during the game. She did not a blink, didn't take her eyes off me for a split second. It was a sign of her affections for me; When you love someone you just can't stop looking at them. Eventually I gave in the chips that I had remaining on my side and pushed the them into the pit and lost it all. It was a good excuse for Laurie and I to leave.
We climbed up the narrow staircase that lead to the attic; another night of physical pleasure. I made up my mind to break up with Laurie when the time was more convenient. Whatever the end result, she had been a perfect rebound.